Al and Tipper No More

RS_GORE-1I was wrenched away from the computer this morning, after I got a call to pick up Ian from school. He had rubbed sunscreen in his eyes and was all puffy. When I got him, he wasn't all that puffy. Next time, I'm going to demand that his eyes swell shut before I get him. I'm compassionate like that.

Anyway, I picked up the non-puffy kid and did some chores together. While I came home, I found that all the bloggers and twitter-types were buzzing about the Gore breakup.

It seems like a rather boring breakup to me. It's not like he had an affair with a stripper with tattoos on her face. (Tattoos on the face really amuse me. It shows commitment to a lifestyle without gainful employment.)


30 thoughts on “Al and Tipper No More

  1. Maybe there weren’t any tatooed strippers, but I would not be surprised if there was someone else in the background. Messing up every single family gathering for the rest of their lives isn’t usually something people past the empty-nest stage undertake without inducements.
    My parents definitely needed to divorce, and it was 100% the right decision, but even after all these years of grandmotherhood, my mother says she still second-guesses the decision every single Christmas and birthday we spend with my dad and step-mom instead of her.

  2. Tattoos on the face really amuse me. It shows commitment to a lifestyle without gainful employment.
    I just walked past a kid, certainly not past 20 years old, with a small tattoo on his cheek and that’s pretty much what I thought, except I was more irked than amused.

  3. “Tattoos on the face really amuse me. It shows commitment to a lifestyle without gainful employment.”
    Bouncer, professional wrestler, bounty hunter, repo man…There’s a short list of professions where it might even be a plus.

  4. So, why do you think Al and Tipper broke up? Maybe she became a global warming denier. “You know, honey, it was a really chilly winter. Maybe you’re a bit off on that warming thing.”
    Or maybe, he went totally hippy over the winter and he stopped bathing and let his beard grow really long, so it smelled like an arm pit.

  5. Amy P., not to be politically incorrect, but those are not really occupations that involve a lot of women.
    There hasn’t been a lot of gossip about Al or Tipper over the years, but maybe the media was covering up, like with John Edwards. Maybe now things will come out. I hope so, because I don’t like politicians and like to see them embarrassed and humiliated.

  6. “Or maybe, he went totally hippy over the winter and he stopped bathing and let his beard grow really long, so it smelled like an arm pit.”
    Brad Pitt’s recent facial hair worries me.

  7. I want to know why, too. Though, since they’re not public employees any more (and aren’t running for employment), I don’t think I have any right to know.
    Buffet & his wife divorced under these circumstances (i.e. empty nest, amicably). The wife went to San Francisco to live, so I’ve always thought that it was because she was gay. But, I’ve reconsidered, and realized that there are a number of women who seem to put up with infidelities until the children are grown, and then decide that it’s enough.
    Buffet’s ex-wife (and mother of his children) is now dead, but she’s even supposed to have matched him up with a surrogate caretaker when she left him, so that he’d still have someone to care about his socks.

  8. The wife went to San Francisco to live…
    Omaha is a very small city and I’d assume that would explain the move.

  9. Do I care? No, I do not. He isn’t in public office anymore. As long as they won’t presume to preach to me about The Correct Way to Live, I will be happy to ignore them.
    This afternoon, I’m sad about Katie Granju’s son. A millionaire and his wife deciding to divorce doesn’t come close.

  10. Yeah, I read about Granju’s son. I was going to post a link to her story later tonight, but your comment made me push it to the top.

  11. A guy who lives in a half-acre house, and goes by private jet to events around the globe, and tells the little people that their life choices contribute to global warning? What would it take to have you call him on telling us the Correct Way To Live?

  12. But the nasally monotone voice, and the incredibly lame personality, combined, let it be said, with the very handsome appearance, have always been there. There must be some reason for a change at this particular point.
    To be honest, in my experience, when couples divorce at this stage of life, the usual explanation is habitual infidelity by the man, endured by the woman for the sake of the children until they are grown, but not thereafter. The only problem with this theory is that it is hard to envision someone generating adulterous passion for Al Gore. But lots of idealistic young girls are passionate about the environment, so maybe that’s the explanation.

  13. y81, he’s gained fifty-sixty pounds in the last three years. He looks like the Michelin Man now! If you want to find a recent change to explain it, there it is.

  14. Nope. Always marry somebody who can change either their vocal pitch or their cadence unless you plan to lose your hearing before you’ve been married 40 years.

  15. Dudes! Taking offense here. Looks/voice/weight — not what makes a relationship work or fall apart. Plus I’m already tired of the Gores’ breakup and I don’t even watch 24-hour news channels.

  16. Wendy – lots of guys leave their wives over looks/voice/weight – not to mention perky tits. Look at the next long haul truck which passes you and you will see ‘I’ll trade my forty for two twenties’ smudged into the dirt on the back of the trailer. Maybe Tipper is leading into the promised land of equity in breakup reasons?

  17. I saw comments from an AARP study on divorce at this stage of life. And I quote:
    Coontz quoted an AARP study of divorces after long marriages that found men often initiate divorce proceedings because they have found someone else, while women pull the plug because they are tired of “putting up with stuff.”

    I can see this; you’ve spent your entire adult life following the guy around, appearing at his press conferences, accommodating his schedule. At some point you just want to take your half of the money and move to the vacation home in Taos. (Or your particular equivalent.)
    But while I can see the logic after some thought, I feel bad for both of them. It’s a loss for the whole extended family.

  18. while women pull the plug because they are tired of “putting up with stuff.”
    Which is why I completely redo my mannerisms and bad habits every five years. In 2012, I stop chewing my fingernails and start my comb-over.

  19. Jen, I believe “putting up with stuff” is a euphemism. Especially when you’re as rich as the Gores. It’s not like Tipper has to clear the table or pick up socks. I repeat, the cases like this among my acquaintances involved habitual male infidelity.
    But it could be the weight, I admit. I’m not the kind of person who drives my SUV to lectures on global warming, so my mental picture of Al Gore is 10 years old.

  20. There’s also the Clinton model. I don’t know if this is so, but at least on evil conservative sites, you see the claim that (while obviously their political lives are closely coordinated), they don’t spend a lot of time living in the same place.

  21. See, that’s what I don’t get. You don’t have to officially divorce to step away from a longstanding relationship of this type. Think Eleanor Roosevelt building her own cottage on the far end of the property.
    I can already hear y81 insisting he was unfaithful, and maybe that’s true. But I still wonder, why go to the effort of actually divorcing?

  22. I think we’ve all seen the near-stabbings that result when a guy retires after 40 years and decides he’s going to make the house run with the same efficiency that made him VP of operations for the quad state area. Maybe it was just that.

  23. For all we know, it’s Tipper who’s found someone else. Or maybe she’s sick to death of the whole political wife thing.
    Male infidelity, especially by the rich and famous, is an obvious (and common) reason for marital breakup. But, fortunately (for the most part) women these days don’t have to prove infidelity, or “outrageous mental cruelty” or physical abuse, in order to get a divorce. Maybe Tipper was just sick to the death of Al and wanted to live on her own in a nice, cozy cottage with a dog, and finally had the opportunity to do so.
    Though if a report came out linking Tipper to some tattooed young hunk, I’d laugh. And say, so much for the PMRC!

  24. For all we know, they would have divorced long ago, but stayed together to support his public image. There’s no reason to assume infidelity on anyone’s part. People can and do grow apart.
    It’s also none of our business.
    I do think, though, that someone needs to develop a tradition of divorce announcements.
    “The children of the Dickinson-Poes announce that their parents are divorcing. Mrs. Dickinson-Poe will be addresses as Ms. Poe, and Mr. Dickinson-Poe will be addressed as Mr. Dickinson. The children’s names have been split down the middle. Male descendants will take the surname Dickinson. Female descendants will take the surname Poe.
    The children may be found at the Poe residence the first and third weeks of each month, and at the Dickinson residence the second and fourth weeks of each month. Extra weeks will be spent at grandparents’ houses, in rotation.”

  25. Spouse theorizes that Al just really, really misses hard-rock music.
    (Spouse then had to cop to being pretty damn old. Since we’re the same age, I guess I’m on the route to trade-in status?)

  26. I do think, though, that someone needs to develop a tradition of divorce announcements.
    Mr. and Mrs. John Doe request the honor of your presence at the divorce of Jane Doe and John Smith.
    Reception to follow.
    ____ Guests of whom _____ have facial tattoos.
    Strippers that are not personal guest of the ex-groom should keep things PG.

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