14 thoughts on “Spreadin’ Love 513”

  1. You are doing them a serious disservice by not telling them that you are having one thing for dinner and it’s up to them whether they want to eat it or go hungry! Really. I’m shocked by this development among parents. Did your parents do this with you? I rather doubt it. Kids are not smart enough to know what’s good for them, which is why they need parents to tell them to do things (like eat what’s for dinner) whether they want to or not.

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  2. “…it’s up to them whether they want to eat it or go hungry!”
    Don’t forget the third option, which is available to big kids like Laura’s–if you don’t like it, go make yourself a bowl of cereal or a sandwich.

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  5. Amy P
    That was what my mother did. We had to take at least 1 bite of everything served, and if we really hated it, we could make ourselves an egg. We had to be old enough to be able to cook an egg on the stove to be able to use that option though, until then we were stuck eating the already cooked dinner.

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  6. I can’t parenting always the way that I would like, because Ian has autism. One of the characteristics of autism is sensory integration disorder. The kids are unusually sensitive to smells, taste, touch, and sounds. If Ian doesn’t like the look of a food, he’ll gag. When he was younger and even more sensitive, he would vomit just at the thought of a food that he didn’t like and I had to mop up vomit off the kitchen table. This also happened in the school cafeteria many, many times. There are some kids in his class who only eat three foods. Ian actually does great for being autistic. He eats all major food groups. Acceptable veggies include peas, carrots, broccoli, cauliflower, sweet potatoes, and corn. He doesn’t like the foods touching each other, too. All things considered, I think I’m fortuneate that he eats a typical Midwestern diet.
    Steve and I eat stuff that few kids would eat. Actually, we eat stuff that my dad and my father in law wouldn’t touch either. I have Jonah take a taste of our dinner. Just being in the same room with strange foods is a major achievement for Ian. If we didn’t prepare alternative meals, the kids wouldn’t eat at all and they would be cranky. They are both underweight, too, so they need the carbs that Steve and I are trying to skip.
    All this food prep is a major pain in the ass. My mom didn’t do this, because she prepared boring food every night. She never made stuffed eggplant or salads with roasted beets and goat cheese. When I’m rushed, we do all eat chicken, potatoes, and broccolli. But I get bored and want to try out new things.

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  7. I have problems similar to Laura’s, but add in a hypoglycemic husband. To my husband, the worst feeling in the world is being hungry. He gets woozy and sick. So he lives in perpetual fear that the kids are hungry. You have to be willing to let kids go hungry to tell them “eat what I made, or no dinner.”

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  8. The eggplant — if you have too much, make baba ganoush. Grill till black, drain and peel, add garlic and tehina and lemon and it’s great. Unfortunately, it takes about 10 eggplants to make a reasonable bowlful.

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  9. I’ve started responding to dinner grumbling by saying that when they start cooking, they’ll get more choices. I’ve actually gotten a positive response from that one. I’ve also mentioned to my 10-year-old that it’s about time she learned to run the bread maker (I really think she could do it–it’s just measuring and pushing some buttons). She’s interested, too.
    I’m 34 weeks pregnant, and it occurs to me that among many other to-dos, it might be a good idea to do some basic cooking instruction very soon. I’m stumped as to what, though. (When I was about that age and had a baby brother, my mom had me and my younger sister frying eggs and toast–yes, frying toast.) I’m not sure that the Venn diagram of “things the kids want to eat,” “things I want the kids to eat,” and “things the kids could make” contains anything. Years ago, a friend gave us a 1950s reprint of a Better Homes and Gardens cookbook for children, and that might be a good place to start.

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  10. Eggplant can be made delicious many different ways. Garden egg (Ghanaian for eggplant) stew is delicious. As is just grilling it over an open flame with olive oil, salt, and pepper. If you want you can add some rosemary or even sage. Of course there are also lots of Italian, Chinese, and even Central Asian dishes using eggplant. Generally kids will eat whatever their parents eat. My kids to my knowledge have never refused to eat anything their mother cooked. This has been especially true with my two year old daughter. She has even gone so far as to acquire my great love of hot sauce which is a bit unusual since most Kyrgyz do not like spicy food.

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  12. Amy, best wishes for the last weeks.
    As for eating eggplant, my rule is to eat the smallest amount possible without giving offense to the person who cooked the eggplant. My former neighbor sold baba ganoush commercially, so I was really happy that my wife hated his wife.

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  14. “Amy, best wishes for the last weeks.”
    Thanks!
    I’m hoping to get through this without too many more episodes of “Wow! I didn’t know that could happen.”

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