Say It Ain’t So, Tige

Amd_jaimee_grubbs It is so. Tiger admits affairs with multiple chicks. It's rather disappointing that his affairs were with such predictable women with puffy lips and boobs. At least Letterman chose to have his affairs with normal looking women.

38 thoughts on “Say It Ain’t So, Tige

  1. Atrios sent me to this from Esquire. Key quote, “Back in 1997, one of the worst-kept secrets on the PGA Tour was that Tiger was something of a hound. Everybody knew. Everybody had a story. Occasionally somebody saw it, but nobody wanted to talk about it, except in bar-room whispers late at night. Tiger’s People at the International Management Group visibly got the vapors if you even implied anything about it. However, from that moment on, the marketing cocoon around him became almost impenetrable. The Tiger Woods that was constructed for corporate consumption was spotless and smooth, an edgeless brand easily peddled to sheikhs and shakers.”

  2. I strongly suspect that in cases like this, who the star has an affair with is heavily dependent on what sort of people are willing to engage in groupie type behavior. I also strongly suspect that being willing to have a great big boob job and lip injections is not incompatible, and even sometimes correlated with, being willing to engage in such behavior. Therefore, the type of women people like Woods have an affair with isn’t necessarily an indication of whom he, or anyone sane, finds more attractive. (Obviously his wife is massively more attractive than the woman in question.)

  3. “Pretty ordinary behavior for a sports figure, I’d say.”
    Yeah, but how about for a talk show host and governors and congressman . . . .? I know a social psychologist who is convinced that all men will philander given the opportunity. In this estimation that meant that 100% of congressman (maybe only Senators would have sufficient opportunity) would have cheated on their spouses. I’m not completely convinced, but in this increasingly intrusive age where “worst-kept secrets” are increasingly difficult to keep it’s becoming harder and harder to maintain my willful belief in the fidelity of any man in the public eye.

  4. In this estimation that meant that 100% of congressman (maybe only Senators would have sufficient opportunity) would have cheated on their spouses.
    Here’s to hoping that balding, pot-bellied white guys are becoming more attractive to women.

  5. Maybe I just have no idea how these things work, but how is it that a news story about Woods crashing his car into a tree morphed into a story about serial infidelities? Were the women all hiding in the tree?

  6. When a married guy with small children crashes his car at 2:30 a.m. after Thanksgiving, people start asking why he was leaving the house in such a hurry at that time.

  7. I’m guessing it was a case of wife attacking SUV with a club? (Just going by what few bits I’ve seen about the crash.)
    I don’t think those women were good affair choices judging from how freely it seems that at least one, and probably two, are talking to the press afterwards. What do you have to gain from that sort of situation? Does it make you look better, reduce your guilt? How much do these news outlets pay?

  8. What do you have to gain from that sort of situation?
    What do people have to gain from being chumps on reality TV? Some people are just desperate for a brush of “fame”, no matter how debased it is.

  9. I’d posted before Matt’s comment–so apparently that is the theory. How sad that we had to go to a Chinese language news source using what looks like the Sims to get it. (Just how good are Tiger’s media people? Or how strong the gentleman’s agreement?)

  10. [quote]Yeah, but how about for a talk show host and governors and congressman . . . .? [/quote]
    None of these job descriptions are correlated with an ordinary degree of attention-seeking behavior.

  11. What I don’t get is lip injections. Why? Fish lips always look bad. I can see a nose job. Maybe even modest sized boob implants, but those lips are not attractive.
    Are people in CA more used to them? Do people out there think that they look good?

  12. I don’t get the lips At All. Really, what sort of body dysmorphia is involved in that decision? (Shudder)
    If I let myself think about it, I get really distressed about the fact that in so many of these cases, the men seem driven to cheat with women whose power and status are so much lower than their own (not to mention their wives’). It’s not that they cheat with these women in spite of the fact that they’re hairdressers or cocktail waitresses and interns — it’s precisely BECAUSE they’re in these lower-status jobs. These women could in fact be brilliant conversationalists, sympathetic company, and entirely enjoyable people — but so would be large swathes of the female population these guys encounter.
    They always seem to dick around with the ones whose status is way below their own. It’s really, REALLY gross.

  13. the men seem driven to cheat with women whose power and status are so much lower than their own (not to mention their wives’).
    I don’t think this is quite getting the dynamic right. Of course Tiger Woods could sleep with lots of women who are better looking (and maybe smarter- I don’t know anything about them) than these women- his wife, for example. But the thing is, these women come to him. For sports stars and actors and the like there is a long line of women who will seek the star out and offer hot sex. I’m sure it’s hard to say no. And they don’t have to do anything for it- it comes to them. The groupies hang out at the hotels, clubs, etc. and go to the stars. The star isn’t thinking “I could do better than this”, he’s thinking “she’s here right now, why should I bother?” People do that with all sorts of choices in their lives. When you are a famous and rich man (especially an attractive one) you can also do this with the sex women will regularly be offering you. (The dynamic here is much more like that with Charlie Sheen when he was found to be on the “hollywood madam’s” list several years ago. When asked why a guy like him would pay to have sex he said he didn’t pay to have sex, he paid for the people to leave afterwords. People like Woods don’t have sex with these women, I suspect, because they are what he really likes, but because they constantly come to him and offer it to him and he thinks, “why not?”

  14. But this is the population of women throwing themselves at anyone famous. And if you’re famous, the groupies come. Along with other opportunists who want to provide drugs for you or sell you scams and seem to have your best interests at heart. It’s pretty much an industry. I bet it’s hard to meet anyone who doesn’t want you for starfucking purposes.
    I have no insight on the fish lips.

  15. I forgot to mention- women with high prestige, power, etc. rarely do things like hang out at hotels and offer sex to stars, follow them around, etc. These women do. Asking why stars have sex with these women is like asking why no high-prestige women are on “rock of love” or something like that. Part of being high-prestige is that you don’t do things like that. (I mean this as a sociological, not a moral, observation.)

  16. I crossed with Marya who said what I wanted to in a shorter and better way. I too have no idea on the lips. Maybe it’s meant to look like Angelina Jolie or something.

  17. It’s really, REALLY gross.
    Always wash your hands after touching a cocktail waitress’s boobs. And before, if your the surgeon doing the installation.

  18. I don’t know about the lips. Yes, you do see them a lot… although not so much among the college crowd, which is a good thing by my lights.
    But you get used to some really really weird things if you’re around them enough, by living in LA. Like velour track suits.

  19. The sex isn’t gross, and the women aren’t gross, either — the implications about this particular male type are gross.
    Are you really saying that none of the other women that Tiger meets on the tour, or that Clinton meets on the job, or that Spitzer encounters at Manhattan parties, are also offering to have sex? How did they meet and attract their wives? I absolutely believe that this is not just about who’s available.

  20. How did they meet and attract their wives?
    Well, I don’t suspect that Wood’s wife waited in the lobby of a hotel and then when he came in offered, on first meeting, to blow his mind with some wild sex. That’s the sort of thing groupies do. Woods isn’t, I suspect, “having a relationship” with these women, and he might well be having sex with other, higher-prestige women, but the groupie phenomena is there for all sorts of stars, and I suspect that it gets pretty hard to pass up after a while, especially if you don’t have a predisposition to pass such things up.
    (The Clinton’s met in law school. I know some people who knew them then and the impression I get is that it was a quick but normal courtship. I doubt very much that Hillary staked out Bill’s apartment and then offered him condition-free wild sex. But that’s just what groupies do.)

  21. I doubt very much that Hillary staked out Bill’s apartment and then offered him condition-free wild sex.
    I like to picture Hillary standing outside Bill’s window with a boombox raised above her head. Then I remember that they were married before “In your eyes” was written.

  22. Are you really saying that none of the other women that Tiger meets on the tour, or that Clinton meets on the job, or that Spitzer encounters at Manhattan parties, are also offering to have sex?
    Maybe they are, but I would think that a “higher class” groupie would realize that they have more to lose by going public than Tiger does. Maybe these three are only three of ten “mistresses,” and the other seven are more attractive, and also classy enough not to get involved with TMZ.
    Anyway, I was listening to Slate’s “Double X Factor” podcast this morning, and the women discussing it took it as a given that if their husbands (who they both assume have been faithful to them) were approached daily by women offering them no-strings-sex, they would cheat just like Tiger would.
    I’m not sure they are wrong, but it seemed to me like the topic would warrant more consideration.

  23. So, wait, it’s NOT gross that we assume that all men, if offered sex by semi-anonymous strangers, would take them up on it, if the offers came fast and frequently enough?
    I’m presuming that some subset of male athletes, politicians, and actors are NOT having sex with any of the many women who approach them, whether they be flirtatious cocktail waitresses or flirtatious PR agents. Some attractive men may even successfully signal that they find those approaches unattractive.
    I’m also presuming that some subset of the male athletes et al. who take advantage of the “freedom of the road” are smart enough to be discrete. They temper their risk-taking with some caution. See Letterman, or George Bush the elder.
    [By the by, none of these women came forward until the Enquirer broke the story, and the first one vigorously denied it. The risk Tiger took wasn’t necessarily from the women, but from the fact that he’s on the road with REPORTERS all the time. It’s as if all the academics of the world decided to have affairs at conferences, and actually believed that no one would carry the gossip home. When presumably, it’s the risk that the news will reach your spouse that makes the choice so “sexy” in the first place.]
    Further, I’m not reading anything here to shake my conviction that men who engage in the types of affairs that Tiger allegedly did were aroused by two factors (i) the thrill that comes from operating close to the edge of discover — because don’t tell me that Tiger Woods of all people is suddenly surprised that no celebrity gets to screw around privately; and (ii) the dramatic power imbalance between themselves and their sexual partners.
    It’s the power imbalance, the presumed sexual thrill it gives certain men, that distresses me so much. Look at all the essays and conversations about marriage lately: are we really going to go on record now saying that men will never be sexually satisfied in a marriage of equals, but always be willing to give a flirty intern a second look?
    Tiger’s just doing what every guy would do if he thought he could get away with it? I’m sorry, I don’t find that compelling at all.

  24. Someone needs to tell me that not all men are scumbags! I need a hug.
    Are the women who throw themselves at these celebrities loathsome or pathetic? I’ve actually never met someone who did this kind of stuff, so I have no clue why a woman gets the lip implants and screws around w/men just because they are famous. Are they so dumb that they don’t really have any viable work options. Are their choices working as a check-out girl at the supermarket or sleeping with Tiger? Are they so desperate for fame that they’ll take it any form?

  25. “So, wait, it’s NOT gross that we assume that all men, if offered sex by semi-anonymous strangers, would take them up on it, if the offers came fast and frequently enough?”
    Ah, but that’s the social psychologist position — that very few men will reject sex under those circumstances. Most men simply don’t have that opportunity. And, the Letterman & congressman “groupies” are different, no, from the rock/athlete groupies. But, they’re still lower status (interns, assistants, or using their status, i.e. lobbyists). I think the power imbalance plays a role — but I think it’s wrong to assume that it is just for the men that this plays a role. I think the women also are seeking power imbalance. The assistant are choosing the boss over the colleague. That’s why the Letterman stuff came out, no? the ex-boyfriend blew up.
    “are we really going to go on record now saying that men will never be sexually satisfied in a marriage of equals, but always be willing to give a flirty intern a second look?”
    Well, I don’t want that to be true, but I worry that it is. Frankly, you’re laying this on the guy, but wasn’t a part of the freak out about Sandra Tsing Loh that she also rejected the marriage of equals (though we don’t know that she did so in favor of a higher status man, but in her world, who knows how status is measured).
    I think the soc-psych position being explored here is that men will indeed always give the flirty intern a second look, and, conversely, that the flirty intern will always give her boss/someone with power the flirty look.
    (I don’t know that I believe this, but I do worry that a plausible argument can be made in favor of the position based on public figures. Someone did, in a book I’m not now remembering)

  26. PS: I think that the men who reject these offers specifically try to design their life so they get fewer of them. Their wives travel with them, for example, along with their kids. They go to bed early. They train harder. So, I don’t believe that everyone does it, but I think that one method of *not* doing it is to reduce opportunity, not just to reject those that are offered.

  27. are we really going to go on record now saying that men will never be sexually satisfied in a marriage of equals
    Some will, some won’t- I don’t think it helps to talk in very broad generalizations here. And, I think the issue is broader and more general than sex- it’s about people offering temptation all the time. I usually advise people to give in to temptation, as one never knows when it will come around again. But for the rich and powerful it comes around all the time- not just in the form of sex partners, but drugs, free things, favors, plumb positions for your kids, and so on. It’s very hard to not give in to temptation when it’s right there, all the time, in front of you, or so I’d guess. (I’m not, alas, speaking from personal experience.) The only really good way to avoid this stuff, I think, is to not put one’s self in a position to be tempted. Most people can’t or won’t do that if they have the option, though.
    As for the women, it seems to me that their lives have gone badly, and I don’t feel the need to say much more about them than that. I don’t find them significantly worse than most people who go on reality shows, let alone horrible talk shows.
    It’s the power imbalance, the presumed sexual thrill it gives certain men, that distresses me so much.
    I’m sure that there are some, maybe many, men for whom this is a, perhaps the, big deal. I don’t (and I expect you don’t, either) have any idea if this applies to Woods or not, though. Certainly this isn’t the only reason why one might have sex with another person who was of lower status. Given this, I’d rather not read minds, especially since the whole episode is really insignificant anyway.

  28. I think the “power imbalance” thing is kind of a red herring. If you are a rich and powerful celebrity or politician, there’s going to be a huge power imbalance in any situation if your affair is with anyone short of Angela Merkel or Oprah. And godforbid you’re in a rare Brangelina-style “couple of equals.” You think the media pounces more when only ONE of you is famous?
    I also think “will most men cheat if given the opportunity” is looking at the issue too narrowly. I think most people will do things that find immoral in the abstract if it is made easy for them to do so, with little chance of getting caught.

  29. “I’ve actually never met someone who did this kind of stuff”
    I’ve never met any of Laura’s friends, so this statement could be true, but I’d be surprised. Quite a few young women of my acquaintance, of the twenty-something upper-middle-class high-powered-college set, had flings with older, powerful men (professors, law firm partners, maybe an occasional entertainment star, etc.), and very few had flings with young bricklayers.
    Now maybe Laura is saying that most of those women settled down, got married, and don’t have flings now. That’s true, but very few of them encounter men of significantly higher status than their husbands.

  30. “I also think “will most men cheat if given the opportunity” is looking at the issue too narrowly. I think most people will do things that find immoral in the abstract if it is made easy for them to do so, with little chance of getting caught.”
    Well, adding the “little chance of getting caught” makes this a “tree falling in the forest” question, ’cause what does particular immoralities (i.e. cheating) do at all, if you don’t get caught (well, and don’t catch any diseases or produce offspring, . . . .). But, the key here seems to be that a fair number of engage in behavior that has a reasonable probably of getting them caught.
    I think these public flame-outs, and the ones that don’t result in flaming (Gingrich, Livingston, Patterson, . . . . ) suggest that men will engage in this behavior even if there’s a significant probability of getting caught. Or, they don’t seem to have caught on that the probability is getting higher all the time.

  31. “PS: I think that the men who reject these offers specifically try to design their life so they get fewer of them.”
    Yes, and/or the men who are interested in messing around structure their lives so that they have lots of opportunities. There’s a reason why certain professions (sailors, traveling salesmen) have traditionally had bad reputations fidelity-wise. A guy who likes a quiet evening at home with the family doesn’t willingly go into a profession that requires lots of evening events, travel, etc.

  32. “Quite a few young women of my acquaintance, of the twenty-something upper-middle-class high-powered-college set, had flings with older, powerful men”
    Yeah, flings with professors seem pretty common in my world, and yes, women I know (and would consider my peer group) had them. But, the women had flings with “brick layers” (i.e. graduate students/post-docs/etc.) too. I don’t know any groupies (even professor groupies) but the Letterman-Intern/Assistant type of relationship definitely happens in my set.
    (Marrying someone/committing/reproducing in graduate school — you did that, too, didn’t you Laura? puts you out of the loop for this kind of thing).
    I’ve been intrigued to realize that there are groupie professions (well, we know about actresses, models, and “hostesses”), but, also pharmaceutical reps (apparently a career path for college cheerleaders) and lobbyists (anyone else noticed the number of female lobbyists implicated in sub-threshold scandals?).

  33. “…lobbyists (anyone else noticed the number of female lobbyists implicated in sub-threshold scandals?).”
    Definitely.

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