Last week, Jonah and I walked downtown to the local pizza joint for a slice. As we ate our slices, six teenage girls in terry cloth short shorts and plastic flip flops flirted with the idiot behind the counter. "Are you really in band?" "Ohmygod!" "Can I see your tatoos?" "Ohmygod!" Then they all posed for pictures on their cellphone cameras.

Jonah said that the screeching got on his nerves. The girls’ tacky clothes got on my nerves. Words on the ass have to be the worst fashion trend of all time.

The local teenage girls have been in press a lot lately. Some morons let their boyfriends post topless photos of them on the school mainframe.