Last Friday night, I volunteered to chaperone "Spirit Night" at the local middle school. I am trying to get out and meet more people in the community. Also, I wanted to spy on my kid to see how he behaves out in the wild.
When I walked into the school, I was handed a name tag and given a task chart for the night. When former CEOs become the head of the PTA, school activities become well oiled machines.
My first task of the night was to hand out neon necklaces to the kids, so they could glow when they danced in the darkened gym. This was a fun job, because I got a good look at all the kids as they came in the doors.
The boys wore t-shirts and jeans. The middle school boy uniform has not changed, since we were kids. The girls wore identical outfits, but they were different from the tight jeans and feathered hair uniform that we wore during my Disco-era middle school. It was a casual event, so the girls wore super short shorts. Hours and hours must have been spent removing leg and bikini line hair. Their hair was long, straight and parted down the middle, Morticia-style. For formal affairs, I understand the girls go for the sausage casing dress that stops below the bum.
There must be some ideal beauty that all the girls were trying to replicate, regardless of their body types. I'm not sure where this ideal comes from. The sausage dress and the Daisy Duke shorts are not in Vogue or other fashion magazines.
I wanted to grab those girls, especially those with the wide hips and the wavy hair, and shout at them, "You're beautiful!" But they wouldn't listen. I try telling my son, who is suddenly desperate to be one of the crowd, that he's a great kid, because he's different. His interests in politics and history are awesome, and he should talk about that stuff at school. But he doesn't listen. He looks at envy at the boys who hit puberty early – the sullen Hulks – and wishes that he was bigger.
I wanted to save all of those kids from the insecurity of middle school, but I couldn't.
Apt. 11d 
I’m not sure where this ideal comes from.
To stay alive in Florida, you need to make it clear that you have no concealed weapons. At least until you’re old enough to get your own weapons.
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“The girls wore identical outfits, but they were different from the tight jeans and feathered hair uniform that we wore during my Disco-era middle school. It was a casual event, so the girls wore super short shorts. Hours and hours must have been spent removing leg and bikini line hair. Their hair was long, straight and parted down the middle, Morticia-style. For formal affairs, I understand the girls go for the sausage casing dress that stops below the bum. ”
Whoa, way different from here. S had a school dance on Friday, and I picked her up from it. The girls tend to wear leggings or capris and longish shirts. Hair styles are all over the place, though I do notice long hair is in. S’s hair goes down to her waist, but she always wears it in a doubled-up pony tail. She does shave, but she takes after her Germanic grandmother (my MIL).
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Abercrombie & Fitch
Forever 21
“club” dresses: http://www.forever21.com/Product/Category.aspx?br=f21&category=dress_club
shorts: http://www.forever21.com/Product/Category.aspx?br=f21&category=btms_shorts&pagesize=100&page=1
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I wanted to save all of those kids from the insecurity of middle school, but I couldn’t.
For most of them, it will be over before they know it and won’t leave a mark. Some will never get over it and will spend a huge amount of time on the internet writing about how they still think about it all the time.
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“I wanted to save all of those kids from the insecurity of middle school, but I couldn’t.”
So, you’re telling my fantasies are futile?
But, as Matt says, maybe our goal can be to have it “over before they notice” and not imagine that we can make middle school better (i.e. just pull the tooth quickly, and not try to make it a pleasant experience, because that’s impossible)?
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It’s my job to try to save kids from middle school. They don’t listen, it’s true, but what I’ve learned is they do talk. An it’s my job to listen and then try to sneak in the wisdom.
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