Book Review: Autism Memoirs

~ Laura

As the number of children with autistic spectrum disorders explodes, the publishing industry has responded with a cottage industry of autism memoirs, including Making Peace with Autism: One Family's Story of Struggle, Discovery, and Unexpected Gifts by Susan Senator,  Jenny McCarthy's delusional books, and Temple Grandin's first hand accounts of living with autism. These books are on a shelf in our local Barnes and Noble at the edges of the children's section, close to the well-worn Thomas the Tank Engine train set, yet not too close. They are near the parenting books, yet not quite a part of them.

I read two autism memoirs last month — George & Sam: Two Boys, One Family, and Autism by Charlotte Moore and All I Can Handle: I'm No Mother Teresa: A Life Raising Three Daughters with Autism by Kim Stagliano.

Who reads these autism books? As Nick Hornby says in the foreword to George and Sam, if you've bent the spine of that book, you probably have a child with autism, or you're a grandparent trying to get to know your grandkid a little better. Autism books are in their own dusty shelf at the bookstore, but a few of those books deserve a broader audience, either because they give provide humanity for mysterious children or because they provide insight into the parent's world. These books take disabled children and their parents our of the dusty shelves in our society.

Stagliano and Moore have multiple children with severe autism. Their stories involve pooping on the sidewalk, losing children at Disney World, and locking up the sweets in the cupboard. Their kids are on the far end of the spectrum. The kid with mild Aspergers' syndrome who in a mainstream classroom with an aide is on the other. The Aspegers' kid may not attend the school prom, but thrives  in the geeky world of Math clubs and Lego leagues. Yet, these kids all have the same labels – autism, disability, special needs. In this world, you are either normal or you're not. Perhaps it's a good thing that we paint the disability brush so broadly. It creates a bigger political movement. But it also creates a huge line between us and them that I don't think really exists. I'm not really sure who is normal anymore.

Published by Laura

8 thoughts on “Book Review: Autism Memoirs”

  1. I actually read Paul Collins’ “Not Even Wrong” a number of years ago, even though I did not have any realy connection with autism. It was pretty good if I remember correctly.

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  2. “normal” as an ideal: No one makes the cut.
    “normal” as a range of behaviors: the lines get really blurry.
    My autistic daughter functions a heck of a lot better than some of her “normal” peers. We all have our quirks. I guess it depends on just how many and what they are that determines “disability”.

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  3. “My autistic daughter functions a heck of a lot better than some of her “normal” peers.”
    Just about every kid would be better for a social skills class, I think.

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  4. The definitions are arbitrary yet they have serious implications. One of my daughter’s classmates in SK is most likely on the spectrum but fairly high functioning. He needs an aide in class with him but because he is so high functioning, his parents struggle to have this aide funded. They currently pay out of pocket and it is a huge financial sacrifice for them. In some twisted way it would be better for the family if he was worse off, at least better financially.
    His classmates are so accepting of him. They get that he needs an aide and that noisy places are hard for him to manage in the same way that they understand that the next kid likes ponies and singing and is a fast runner.

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  5. “As the number of children with autistic spectrum disorders explodes …”
    No it doesn’t. Recognition explodes, calling “autistic” traits a “disorder” has exploded, but I haven’t seen any evidence that a smaller fraction of the population had these traits 20, 200, or 2000 years ago.

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  7. Thanks for the alerts about these books. I’m always on the look for interesting autism memoirs!
    Youngest is often dubbed “high functioning” but her official diagnosis is moderately autistic. We don’t deal with difficulties as basic and fraught as the ones you describe in these memoirs, but there’s a huge investment of time and effort pouring into her education.
    The potential pay-off is great: can we help her to become a semi-independent adult? That would be a far better result than the institutionalization or marginalization of a few generations back.

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  8. “Normal,” like “natural” is one of those words which carries the baggage of centuries of European history. It can mean a range, what is good, what is to be exceeded, what is not malfunctioning. And it’s constantly shifting over time, even in at least some cases of the normal distribution.
    And ultimately, what ease does it give you in terms of the challenges you have to face? Only mental.

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