Since everybody’s whining about doing homework with their kids, let me join in. (Here’s an old post by Harry on the topic.)

Jonah, the drama-queen, has been giving me HELL about homework for the past couple of months. The homework isn’t particularly onerous. It’s not all that interesting, just pages torn out of a workbook, but there isn’t a huge quantity of it. Yet, my kid manages to turn about 20 minutes of studying spelling words and filling in a worksheet into a two hour experience. He’s a smart kid. When he’s paying attention, he can whip through the work, but Jonah daydreams. Now, I have no idea where he gets that trait from, because I have laser-like concentration, but still… He has to finish his work, so we can get on with our lives.

Yesterday, I wiped away the bits of rice and chicken on the table after dinner and set him up with his homework — two worksheets and spelling words. Ian was given a coloring book. Since Ian hates coloring, he tore out of the kitchen into the living room and started singing to himself and walking in circles, which he is absolutely not allowed to do, because he’s going to get beaten up for doing odd things when he’s in Kindergarten. So, I yanked him back to this side of normal and bribed him with chocolate to do some coloring.

When we got back to the kitchen, Jonah was experimenting with gravity. He wanted to see how far he could tip his chair backwards before he fell over. Jonah! Stop it! Chair down. Legs forward. Do your work. He sighed and looked back down at the page. Then Ian needed some assistance with coloring in the train. After a short time, Ian shouted, “Help” and ran out of the room. I let him go. I made Jonah read the directions on his worksheet out loud. The whole time his legs were thrashing about. He seemed to get it, so I turned away for a while and cleaned up the kitchen. After five minutes, he had done nothing. Now, he was experimenting with the erasing qualities of a rubber band. Jonah! What are you doing? Why aren’t you doing your work. “I’m thinking”, he shouts back and tips over a cup of juice on the worksheet, which also has holes in it from the rubber band experiment.

This went on and on with much sighs and body contortions and shouts and culminated with Jonah locking himself in the bathroom and announcing that he was going to run away from home and live by the railroad tracks.

Today, we put together a new incentive chart. I need a drink.