I’ve been multi-tasking conflict for the past two days.
There was the Yale future homemakers article that set off a controversy that ranged over three blogs. In fact, I lost track if we were mad at the Times for always talking about the world from the perspective of a few rich people, or if we were mad at society for creating inequities or if we were mad at freeloading rich chicks who were throwing off the great revolution in order to take their kids to Gymboree or if we were mad at rigid minded, aging feminists who have made women guilty for staying at home. Ack. This topic makes people nutso. A throw away article with no meat or facts to dig our teeth into made us froth at the mouth.
Then I’ve been having my own private battle with the Ian’s special education teacher who refuses to tell me what happens in class on a daily basis. He can’t tell me if he cried or if he had fun or if got frustrated or just about anything. It didn’t really seem like a big deal for the teacher to stick her head out of the door and just give me two sentences of information. But she doesn’t want to, so I’ve been researching my options and talking to my special ed. listserv.
So, too much conflict. No stomach for it today. Run away. Run away. Find a nice safe topic….
So, how about Kate Moss snorting up her H&M money? Shocked.
Another bit of breaking news from the Post. Tyra Banks proves her breasts are real on TV. Thank God, the world finally knows the truth.
And the Pitt/Jolie/Anison thing just gets better and better.
Apt. 11d 
Sorry about the non-responsive special ed. teacher. That was yet another problem we had with our son’s original school – the place he’s in now is infinitely better; we get a sheet with some info every day. (Perhaps another public-private distinction?
If Ian starts making progress in leaps and bounds, I could see living with the lack of communication, but it’s certainly not ideal.
Do you have another place you could threaten to put him into if they don’t cooperate?
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I’m sorry you’re having trouble with the preschool teacher. My four year old son attends an integrated (special-ed) public preschool in Amherst, Ma. Our teacher sends home a daily “newsletter” that lists snack, activities, songs, etc. In addition, a notebook travels back and forth between parent and teacher each day in which I write how my son is doing at home/my concerns and the teacher briefly comments on my son’s mood, interactions, and adjustment during the day. I love it! My son’s teacher also calls in the evenings during the beginning of the year to touch base about my son. I think a short daily newsletter, communication notebook, and weekly phonecalls, etc. would be relatively easy for your son’s teacher to add and the benefits to your peace of mind and your ability to bring home and school together for your son could be huge. This is so important. Hopefully she’ll help. If not, have the request for daily updates officially added to his IEP. Good luck.
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Thanks, Dr. Manhattan and Simone.
Ian’s speech made big progress this summer, but nowhere near good enough to tell me complicated ideas. He could not even begin to tell me if he’s upset because he was in time out or because another kid hit him. He couldn’t tell me if he really liked a particular book. If I can’t understand him, he gets frustrated. I really need to know what’s going on.
The teacher absolutely refuses to do any of those wonderful things that your child’s teacher does, Simone. No notebook, no phone calls, nothing. I asked for a list of the other children’s names, so I could have Ian practice saying them. She told me I’ll get a school directory in a couple months. She said that she has no time to fill out communication notebooks and that she has nine other kids in the class. She can’t just attend to Ian. Even though she has three aides, it would be wrong for any of them to talk with me.
I am not sure if I should pull out the heavy infantry for this fight or not, because they are certainly going to be other battles with this school system.
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Hi Laura, I encourage you to make classroom updates/daily communication an issue! Also, if possible, do not feel guilty. From your entry, I hear: 1) you feel disconnected from your son’s school time/you feel sad that you don’t know if your son played with other children or cried and 2) you don’t want to make too many demands/you want to choose your battles. I feel strongly that you have the right to know, on a daily basis and in a brief way, what went on in your son’s preschool classroom. I think you need to call an IEP meeting and not feel bad about doing so. During the meeting, focus on your daily communication request as a tool to help your son learn. The lack of updates is preventing your son from learning–if given daily updates, you would reenforce lessons at home and plan for outside socialization with peers he’s formed connection with in the classroom. If the teacher refuses your request for daily updates, make her add the refusal to your IEP document. I think it is unlikely she will continue to refuse if asked to do so on a legal document. I’m sorry that you have to feel like you are being aggressive to get what you need to help you and your son.
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